5 Hidden Signs of Depression video
This type of depression is not like what we normally think of depression: a chilling, heavy darkness that absorbs a person's energy and prevents them from getting out of bed. And yet it is just as serious, exhausting, and devastating.
Perfectly Hidden Depression is not a diagnosis. It is a syndrome that consists of a group of behaviors and beliefs.
People with hidden depression rarely see their problems and discomforts as depression, and those around them generally do not. No one suspects that something is wrong. Because what people see and what the person projects is the image of someone who has handled immense pressures and losses and has escaped unharmed. They are great parents, helpers, and workers. They are highly efficient, organized and optimistic.
But underneath that joyous, productive, and perfect exterior lies pain, loneliness, and despair.
Why do people deny their depression?
Sometimes it is a conscious decision, and sometimes it is not.
The need to repress, hide, become invisible, or look perfect in the eyes of others develops mainly during childhood. For example, having been in a home with parents who struggled with addiction, you may have grown up quickly to care for your siblings. Therefore, taking responsibility for everything and everyone while neglecting your own needs is natural for you.
Or maybe you grew up with a father who only paid attention to the things you did well: only then did you feel loved. So you became an achiever who prioritizes perfection and ignores his deepest desires.
Hiding your depression can also come from beliefs and cultural norms. Perhaps talking about your emotions or your mental health in general has always been prohibited or you have been discouraged to do so. Perhaps seeing a therapist in your family is considered weak and shameful.
Signs and symptoms of hidden depression
Here are the 10 specific signs of Perfectly Hidden Depression:
- You are highly perfectionist with a constant and critical inner voice that constantly embarrasses you.
- You have an excessive sense of responsibility.
- You have difficulty accepting and expressing painful emotions.
- You worry a lot and avoid situations that are not possible to control.
- You focus intensely on tasks, using your accomplishments as a way to feel valuable.
- You have a sincere concern for the well-being of others, but you don't let anyone (or just a few) enter your inner world.
- Discard or omit past or present harm or abuse.
- You have mental health problems, which involve controlling or escaping anxiety.
- You have a strong belief in "counting the things life blessed you with" as the basis of your well-being
- Has difficulty exploring personal relationships but demonstrates significant professional success.
How to get help
If you think you have hidden depression, seek professional help.
If you notice the symptoms mentioned above in a loved one, something very important is that you focus on the aspects that you have observed and how they are affecting you, and mention things such as: "I am sad that you are this way..." or "I feel helpless when I see you ..."
It is also advisable to be indirect and give the person information about hidden depression. After all, getting defensive is a normal reaction for anyone as the change is terrifying. Also, remember that people with hidden depression have a strong need for hiding; it protected them and somehow it 'worked' for them for years.
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