7 Reasons Why People Ignore You video
We all want to be loved and accepted. Sometimes we go wrong the way to achieve it. If they do not take you into account, perhaps you did not choose well the weight to give to the opinion of others. Here we show you an alternative path.
Sometimes it's good to stop and ask yourself why others overlook your ideas, your feelings, and even your presence . You feel that they make you invisible and do not understand the reason why they do not take you into account, when you are always attentive to others (or at least that is the feeling you have).
It is very usual that if you are used to being overlooked by others, there comes a time when you do not see a problem with this . You think that if others do not take you into account, it is simply because you define yourself as someone with a low profile, or you do not like to appear or make others uncomfortable.
In reality, this does not have to be the case. All human beings deserve respect and recognition and you are no exception . What you think, what you feel and what you want is as valuable as what others think, feel and want. If you are interested in knowing the reasons why they do not take you into account, reflect on the following points.
" If you want to live happy, don't mind if they think you are stupid ."
1. You make unnecessary sacrifices for others
It is not true that you should think of others before yourself ; at least it is not from a mental health standpoint . Thinking of yourself first is not selfish, but healthy logic. Sacrificing yourself for others unnecessarily carries a message: others are more important than you.
Why do you think that on airplanes, when giving instructions on how to act in an emergency, they point out that in case of depressurization you must first put on the oxygen mask and then put it on children or people who need assistance ? Think about it.
2. Dependence on approval
There are a whole series of implicit and unconscious mechanisms through which a person conveys the idea that he needs, vividly, the approval of others. If you need to be approved by others, it is because you need information that reinforces the feeling that you have value.
Generally, the dependence on approval that generates in others is a feeling of rejection. You are sending a negative message about yourself. By not trusting you, why should others trust who you are? If you invalidate yourself, it is easier for others to do the same.
3. You look for mistakes only in yourself
It is possible that, without realizing it, you end up feeling responsible for everything that happens around you . When something bad happens, you automatically feel guilty, without knowing why. The bad news is that others, also without being very aware of it, will end up thinking the same thing.
On many occasions, no one will thank you for being willing to carry tasks that do not correspond to you. Quite the opposite. You will end up becoming a scapegoat on many occasions . Better never think about who is "to blame"; rather, focus on how to fix things.
4. Praise yourself, a reason why you are not taken into account
Perhaps, the fact that your achievements transcend in a plane that is not very visible to others leads you to praise yourself frequently. Talk about your virtues, or your achievements, or how much you do for others.
This is just another way to show how dependent you are on outside opinion . The only person you have to convince is yourself. What is really important is that you know how valuable you are and how much you contribute. What others think is secondary.
5. You don't know how to define the limits
It is possible that in situations in which you feel that they have been unfair to you, you decide to forgive, even without being asked. It seems to you that forgiveness is less emotionally expensive than confronting the other for their offense .
One way or another, you end up justifying whoever offends you . You forget that everything has a limit and that you must mark your terrain. This may require more of you in the short term, but it will prevent you from continuing to be the target of offense and assault in the long term.
6. You think that respect is relative
All human beings deserve respect. It doesn't matter if you are tall or short, ugly or pretty, clever or scattered, rich or poor, black or white. However, you may feel that they should only respect you if you are able to contribute something, to give something, to do something for someone.
It is a mistake to think that you must do something to earn the respect of others. Just because you're human, you already deserve respect . Animals and plants deserve it too. No one has the right to step on you, even if you make mistakes or do something inappropriate.
7. You have problems with self-respect
When you feel like they don't take you into account and you get used to it, you also lose track of what an assault means . In other words, it is more difficult for you to be able to identify an assault. It seems to you that it is normal and that you should endure it.
You may not have thought enough about how others treat you. It is also possible that you are not clear about the effect of abuse on your life . Perhaps the time has come for you to think about it in greater detail.
Many times they do not take you into account, unfairly, because deep down you have a negative opinion of yourself . But you want to be good with others and you wish you were more important to others. What happens, simply, is that you are mistaking the strategy to achieve it.
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