8 Things Mentally Strong People Don't Do video
Mentally strong people have healthy habits . They manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in a way that sets them up for success in life.
We often hear advice like: "Think positively and good things will happen" or "Do your best, and eventually things will work out."
While these words of wisdom certainly have merit, these well-intentioned suggestions won't help you reach your goals if you're engaging in unhealthy behavior at the same time.
Recognizing and replacing unhealthy "thoughts," "behaviors," and "emotions" that may be sabotaging your best efforts is the primary key to developing mental toughness.
Below, take a look at these 13 things mentally strong people don't do, according to the renowned author:
1. They don't waste time feeling sorry for themselves
Mentally strong people do not waste time feeling sorry for their circumstances or how others have treated them. Instead, they take responsibility for their role in life and understand that life is not always easy or fair.
Difficulties and sadness are inevitable, but feeling sorry for 'yourself' is an option. Even when you can't solve the problem, you can choose to control your attitude.
2. They don't give up their powers
Mentally strong people do not allow others to control them, and they do not give another person power over them. They don't say things like "My boss makes me feel bad" because they understand that they are in control of their own emotions and have a choice about how to respond.
Nobody has power over your way of thinking, feeling or behavior!
Changing your daily vocabulary is a way of acknowledging that the decisions you make are yours. Instead of saying, "I have to work late today," change that sentiment to "I'm choosing to stay late."
There may be consequences if you don't work late, but it is still an option. Empowering yourself is an essential component that prepares you for success in life.
3. They are not afraid of change
Mentally strong people don't try to avoid change. But instead, if they welcome positive change and are willing to be flexible. They understand that change is inevitable and they believe in their abilities to adapt.
There are five stages of change: pre-contemplation, contemplation, preparation, action, and maintenance.
Sticking with each of the five steps is crucial. Making changes can be scary, but avoiding them prevents growth. "The longer you wait, the harder it gets, and other people will get over you."
4. They don't waste energy on things they can't control
You won't hear a mentally strong person complain about lost luggage or traffic jams. Instead, they focus on what they can control in their lives. They recognize that sometimes the only thing they can control is their attitude.
"It feels so safe to have everything under control, but thinking that we have the power to always pull the strings can be problematic".
Trying to be in control of everything is probably a sure appeal to anxiety. "Instead of bringing more anxiety, try to control your surroundings".
Changing your focus on things you can't control can create greater happiness, less stress, better relationships, new opportunities, and more success.
5. They don't care about pleasing everyone
We often judge ourselves by considering what other people think of us, which is the opposite of mental toughness.
Mentally strong people recognize that they don't need to please everyone all the time. They are not afraid to say 'no' or speak up when necessary. They strive to be kind and fair, but they can deal with other people's anger if it doesn't make them happy.
6. They are not afraid to take calculated risks
"They don't take reckless or foolish risks, but they don't mind taking calculated risks."
People are often afraid of taking risks, be it financial, physical, emotional, social, or business. But it all comes down to knowledge.
Mentally strong people spend time exploring the risks and benefits before making a big decision, and are fully informed of the potential downsides before taking any action.
"Lack of knowledge about how to calculate risk leads to increased anxiety".
To better analyze a risk, ask yourself the following questions:
- What are the possible associated costs?
- What are the possible associated benefits?
- How will this help me achieve my goal?
- What are the alternatives?
- How good would it be if the best case scenario came true?
- What's the worst that could happen and how could you reduce the risk of it happening?
- How bad would it be if the worst case scenario came true?
- How much will this decision matter in five years?
7. They don't obsess over the past.
The past is in the past! Mentally strong people don't waste time thinking about the past and wishing things could be different. They acknowledge their past and can tell what they have learned from it.
Another thing, they don't constantly relive bad experiences or fantasize about the glory days. Instead, they live for the present and plan for the future.
There is no way to change what happened, and "reliving it can be self-destructive, preventing you from enjoying the present and planning for the future". "It solves nothing and can lead to depression".
However, thinking about the past could be beneficial as: to reflect on lessons learned, to take into account the facts and control emotions or to look at a current situation from a new, more helpful perspective.
8. They don't make the same mistakes over and over.
They accept responsibility for their behavior and learn from their past mistakes. As a result, they don't keep repeating those mistakes over and over again. Instead, they create a thoughtful plan to move forward and make better decisions in the future.
9. They do not resent the success of other people
Mentally strong people can appreciate and celebrate other people's success in life. They don't get jealous or feel cheated when others get over them. Instead, they recognize that success comes with hard work, and they are willing to work hard for their own shot at success.
"Resentment is like an anger (rage) that remains hidden and bottled up within you". "Focusing on someone else's success will not pave the way to yours, as it distracts you from your path".
Even if you achieve success, you may never be happy if you always focus on others. It can also overlook all your talents, abandoning your values and associations.
10. They don't give up after the first failure.
They don't see failure as a reason to give up. Instead, they use failure as an opportunity to grow and improve. They are willing to keep trying until they get it right.
Thinking that failure is unacceptable or that it means that you are not good enough does not reflect mental toughness. In fact, "bouncing back after failure will make you stronger".
11. They are not afraid of time alone
Mentally strong people can tolerate being alone and are not afraid of silence. They are not afraid to be alone with their thoughts and can use downtime to be productive.
They enjoy their own company and do not depend on others for company or entertainment all the time, but can be happy alone.
"Making time to be alone with your thoughts can be a powerful, instrumental experience in helping you achieve your goals". Becoming mentally strong "requires that you take time out of the daily rush of life to focus on personal growth."
12. They don't feel like the world owes them anything
They do not feel entitled to things in life. They weren't born with the mindset that others would care for them or that the world should give them something. Instead, they seek opportunities based on their own merits.
It's easy to get mad at the world for your failures or lack of success, but the truth is that no one has a right to anything. It must be earned!
"Life shouldn't be fair". If some people experience more happiness or success than others, "that's life, but that doesn't mean you are owed anything if you got a bad move."
The key is to focus on your efforts, accept criticism, acknowledge your shortcomings, and not keep score. Comparing yourself to others will only disappoint him if he doesn't get what you think you are owed.
13. They don't expect immediate results
Whether they are working to improve their health or start a new business, mentally strong people do not expect immediate results. Instead, they apply their skills and time to the best of their ability and understand that real change takes time.
"Personal growth develops slowly." Whether you're trying to get rid of your procrastination tendencies or improve your marriage , expecting instant results will lead to disappointment.
Think of your results as a 'marathon', not a 'sprint'. See potholes in the road as minor setbacks rather than total obstacles.
At some point in your life, you are going to need all the mental strength you can muster, whether it be from the loss of a loved one, financial hardship, or a major health issue. Mental toughness will give you the stamina to overcome challenges.
And the good news is that everyone can build their mental muscle. Practice being your own mental strength coach. Pay attention to the areas where you are doing well and find out where you need to improve. Create opportunities for growth and then challenge yourself to be a little better today than yesterday.
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