Neglecting self-esteem without realizing it

03.09.2020

Self-esteem is increasingly identified as a fundamental pillar on the basis of psychological balance and proper emotional management , so that it affects people's well-being and an adequate way of being, being or feeling.

There are different ways of loving little or almost nothing and not looking like it . When we attribute events to bad luck or circumstances, for example. The truth is that, sometimes, we don't do things for ourselves, to take care of ourselves, to feel good, to love ourselves; And that can become a way to destroy us, to ruin us a little more as people.

From self-destruction to caring for self-esteem

There are many ways to destroy ourselves, to harm ourselves without being considered part of a pathology, but being something negative and dangerous. Let's review some ideas that have to do with self-esteem.

1. Learn to accept ourselves

We are unique and unrepeatable beings and we are in constant evolution and change . Sometimes we are left with distorted images of ourselves and do not incorporate acceptance and recognition to the changes we are making. Nor do we accept what we do not like as the first step to modify it.

2. Try to be critical in the right measure

Some people are very hard on self-criticism, and it seriously damages their self-esteem. They are martyred for decisions made, blame themselves for unforeseen consequences, and continue to hold these kinds of thoughts long enough to make it unbearable.

Finding the balance when making judgments about your own behavior is a skill that must be worked on and developed.

3. Perform frequent self-care actions

It is important to do this by disassociating self-care from the concept of selfishness , clearly frowned upon and sometimes confused with that of self-centeredness.

Being selfish is not always bad and taking care of ourselves is essential, since, if we do not do it each one, we hope that the others will do it, without knowing exactly when we need it most. We talk about simple things that can be sophisticated as much as necessary: ​​a calm and unhurried breakfast, a reading time, a shower that is not against the clock or a walk with enough time, perhaps a relaxed talk or whatever you know. that you feel great.

4. Promote actions to achieve our vital objectives

Knowing what we want to achieve at each stage of life and making the action plan to achieve it can be something simple or very complex, but it requires stopping to think about it, being responsible in the intermediate steps and chain actions . If that's what you want to achieve, get on with it, don't expect it to come alone.

5. Consider our priority needs from time to time

If we allow ourselves to be carried away by the urgency of the environment or of others, sometimes, our needs remain in a permanent queue and their turn never comes , unless we put them in the front row. From time to time you have to look at that and reestablish the order of needs.

Assessment of the initial situation

And now there are some questions: what do you intentionally do to feel comfortable inside your skin? How do you act and how do you talk to yourself? Are you consistent with your values ​​and principles?

Inertia, the movement generated by the current that occurs around us, sometimes leads us towards behaviors that, in reality, are not what we want or those that make us feel good . It is necessary to stop and reflect on it, to realize the most frequent thoughts and the language that we use, because it influences those thoughts and the emotions that are generated.

Look at your internal messages, maybe they go along the lines of "I can't do anything else" or "It's not worth going against the current". But it is about you, the most important thing in your life. If you don't consider yourself important, and you convince yourself that "it's worth it" to do everything possible to be well, at ease; then you stop taking care of yourself, loving yourself, respecting yourself and, without being fully aware, you begin to self-destruct and, as a consequence, to harm those around you.

It is easy to let yourself be carried away by victimhood and put yourself in the place of a passive subject, instead of considering ourselves responsible and taking initiatives with an eye on us, on feeling good, strong, capable; in learning from past mistakes to look to future opportunities. In short, in feeling that everyone has the power to influence what happens around you.

We know that we are living in difficult times, bad experiences or mistrust abound and new complications appear every moment. The easy thing is to get carried away by discouragement and the tendency to think that we can do nothing, but ... can we really do nothing?

Maybe it is time to take care of yourself like never before , to build confidence and self-esteem for real, with conviction and every day. Unleash your potential and test the options in front of you. Experience the moments when things turn out, even if it is good, regular or bad. But don't stop doing it, trying your options again. Nobody better than you to believe in you. Take care of your self-esteem , it is a safe value.

Psychotherapy is not simply about meeting with the psychologist and telling him out loud about the frustrations that we have been carrying over the last days or weeks; nor is it going to informative sessions in which as patients we internalize theoretical knowledge about what happens to us and we let go of false beliefs.

The concept of "addiction" usually goes hand in hand with that of "drug", but in practice, this is not the case. There are addictions in which the consumption of any addictive substance is not involved, and in fact, they are not statistically rare cases.

Dynamic Psychology is an approach oriented to the study of the forces that act in the individual , between the organization of the personality and the consequences of these.