Psychological advice for relationships
There are many moments capable of creating a bad atmosphere at home . Having lived many things together as a couple with the children involved, and for different reasons that have snowballed, the situations capable of creating a latent tension are varied.
Perhaps they have been problems with his or her family, some day-to-day friction, financial issues, etc. What to do?
5 keys to enhance happiness in life as a couple
The first thing to be clear about is that in a healthy couple there are a series of emotions or principles that are always there , these are:
- Respect: zero insults and slights.
- Honey: warmth is important.
- Empathy: recognizing the feelings of our partner.
- Fluid communication: create a good atmosphere of cordiality, which will lead to intimacy.
This will give you both a physical and mental well-being that will make us happy and, above all, will allow you to achieve a clear mutual stability that will help you to be more complete.
At this point we ask ourselves a question: what works when the relationship is stable and the two members of the couple like it? We are going to see the pillars to take into account to give an answer to this question, how to strengthen them, and how to make them last.
1. The commitment
If you find it difficult to commit to your partner or you notice that he or she does too, it is clear that something is wrong . Commitment arises by itself, and it is always what we feel best about, when we see that the other party wants to spend their time with us and decides to give us part of their time to enjoy it.
When we commit to living a life together, it means that we will do everything possible to make that life together work. Living together is not the goal, but to be happy living together. We are going to enhance it:
- Valuing the positive qualities: since this way we will pay more attention to the positive and will end up highlighting the negative.
- Thanking you for what you have in common with your partner regarding their way of being or their feelings shown in the face of bad experiences lived as a couple.
This results in good conversations (fluid communication) . It is important that you can talk daily about your things, in order to get to know each other more and establish conversations that lead you to know each other in depth, thus understanding feelings and perspectives on life that help to understand the other. In this way we will avoid being simply roommates and having that feeling of loneliness. To achieve this, these key ideas must be taken into account:
- Recognize the moment: having a good drink in hand, a good dinner accompanied by a moment of intimacy with the person we love the most will make us feel more comfortable to express what we feel.
- Do not confuse telling intimate things with not having a filter: of course, I ask that you have empathy. Surely you know what topics your partner does not like to know about, be aware. The objective is that you can talk about your feelings or ways of thinking and even future projects that you would like to start with him.
3. React the same to conflict situations
Each has a very personal style, perhaps one more combative than the other, but the important thing is that a positive conclusion is always reached between the two . To achieve this, you must set yourself goals:
- Establish rules to discuss: such as not chasing each other, when you notice that you are going to say something rude, do not do it, etc.
- Establish a series of rules to which we commit ourselves so as not to fall into discussions that we have been dragging for a long time: if for example they occur due to problems of order, establish a series of rules regarding them.
4. Emotional and bodily connection
This is important to be able to establish some points of union with which we can feel heard by the other party, and above all feel a mutual feeling that we can enjoy.
- A good form of emotional connection is to be able to do guided meditations together and feel the energy of both. A good exercise for example is to follow these meditations hand in hand in order to feel the energy of the other person, hear their breathing, feel the heat of their body, etc.
5. Satisfying sex life
Fifth point and no less important; this is something vital that we have to look at. Many times we believe that having a relationship with a partner has nothing to do with sex, or that perhaps this can be relegated to a second point for not having time . This is a bad decision that will only make us worse. For this reason we have to have clear resources to be able to enhance it and get better sensations.
- Do not forget to make use of sexual games or resort to bibliography that will make you understand this game better.
When we reason about a problem, we tend to use a simple and useful outline most of the time. This way of thinking is what is known as linear thinking.
Coercive persuasion is a cognitive mechanism that operates through false beliefs and misconceptions. It leads a victim to think that it is desirable and convenient to perpetuate the bond that he maintains with his aggressor.
In couple relationships there is always a certain degree of commitment and, of course, seeking the company of the person you love. However, some people have an excessive emotional dependence on their partners .